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Game-Winning Chess Jokes

Become the New Class Clown

Love playing chess, and looking for a way to liven up your matches? Tell a few of these great chess jokes, and have your opponent rolling on the floor laughing while you win!

1. A woman was walking on the beach when she notices there is another woman playing chess with her Yorkie terrier. She declared, "Wow, that's a smart dog you have!"

Then the dog owner said, " Not really, I am just up by four games to one.

2. An intelligent researcher, an artist, and a chess masters were given an opportunity to go on a date with the most beautiful woman on the planet. The winner would be picked by what he would say to the woman: The researcher will describe to her that she is the prettiest diamond in the universe. The artist will perform for her, and they would make amazing music together.

When it was the chess masters turn, he said of her "does the date have a time limit?

3. In the chess club: “I’m the King.”

“We know.”

4. There are 4 chess players that needed to go to a chess competition together by a van. After awhile, the taxi driver suddenly to check the street map:

“What do you think? Do you guys prefer to if we take the main variation or the side variation?”

5.When I was younger, I was learning how to play chess.

I remember once I tried to move my castle first, but It was a rookie error

6.My friend asked me if I’m good for playing a game of chess next Saturday.

I responded back that I will need to check, mate.

7.Thinking about producing a film about playing chess in an elevator.

The Dark Knight Rises.

8.Why can't the British play chess?

Because they don’t know the difference between a Bishop and a Queen.

9.What did the chess player say to the waiter?

Pass the check, please

10.How come it took so long for the chess master to finish his dinner?

Because the surface had a checkered tablecloth and it took a long time to pass the salt and pepper.

11.Where did the chess player sleep?

In a Queen size bed upstairs

12.Two beginners: “I improved my English, Dutch, French, and Mandarin Chinese.” “Then you must be smart!” “Why?” “You learn multiple languages, so quickly ”

“I am talking about chess openings, not languages.”

13.Why it’s a bad idea to buy a house from a chess player?

She'll take a long time to move!

14.A Chess Player is walking from the river and was carrying two fish in a container. She was approached by the Game Warden and asks her for her fishing license. She says back to the warden,

"I didn’t grab these fish, they are my pet's pawn.

15.Why did the two Kings go to the tournament?

To check it out

Looking for a great chess joke to tell your fellow chess enthusiasts at the next chess tournament? Well, look no further than the chess board of jokes we have assembled here for you. Turn any chess game into a laughing match with each hilarious chess pun or funny joke we have here, and you'll be the chess champion of comedy in no time! We all know that the chess board is the home of the superior board game, which no checker board or magic tricks could ever checkmate. Become a chess grandmaster of knock knock jokes and other chess jokes, as you sweep across the chessboard with moves of humor and an arsenal with not a pawn, rook, or night, but a sharp chess pun and funny joke ready to crown you the new chess champion of the board at your next chess match. Jokes about the weirdest chess sets, recent tournament victories, or the classic czech mate joke are all funny, but we have the best chess joke for chess enthusiasts anywhere in the world right here, and you will be the new grandmaster of comedy in your chess program, kid. Bad news- there's a new chess puzzle sheriff in town, and he's here to turn every piece and chess funny pictures into a hilarious chess board joke, and even 14 chess couples couldn't take down the new moves of the chess piece joke master. You can even tell a chess riddle, about a bunch of chess nuts boasting around an open fire, or impress your chess club or chess program with a new chess piece joke about a knight that will have any chess master rolling on the ground laughing. The chess problem of it being a boring game have been blown away with these great chess jokes, and that glorified checkered tablecloth is now a monument to comedy and brilliant chess puzzle jokes. Break in your new chess set with humor, and rack up those recent tournament victories with these unstopabble chess jokes.

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