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A Whole Score Of Soccer Jokes

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The good old game of soccer, or football, is beloved by kids in the backyard and professionals alike. Hit that goal of cracking up your family with these great soccer jokes!

Why is Cinderella terrible at playing soccer?

She is always running away from the ball

What do you call it when a dinosaur gets a goal?

Dino-score

Who is the cleanest player on a soccer field?

The Sweeper

What time is it when the elephant steps on the soccer ball?

Time to get a new ball

Why is it always warmer at the end of the game?

All of the fans left

How do you stop a squirrel from playing soccer in your backyard?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

What kind of tea do soccer players like to drink?

Penal-tea

Girlfriend: What kind of jersey should I buy?
Boyfriend: A goalie jersey
Girlfriend: Why?

Boyfriend: That way I can tell everyone my girlfriends a keeper

What does a soccer player say on Halloween

Ha-trick or treat

How do athletes stay cool?

They stand near the fans!

Why did the soccer ball quit the team?

He was sick of being kicked around.

Why are soccer players good at math?

They are always using their heads

Why wasn't the nose on the soccer team?

He didn't get picked.

Why shouldn't you play soccer in the jungle?

There is too many cheetahs in there!

How did the field get all wet?

The players kept dribbling on it.

Two soccer teams play a game against each other, one team wins but not a single man from either team scored a goal, how can this be?

It was a women's soccer game.

Why did the soccer player bring a string to the game?

So they could tie up the game.

What lights up a soccer stadium?

A Soccer match.

What would David Beckham's name be if he were a spice girl?

Waste of Spice

Which soccer player has the biggest cleats?

The one with the biggest feet.

What runs around the entire soccer field but never even moves an inch?

The fence

Where is the best place to get a soccer shirt?

New Jersey

Why don't grasshopper's watch soccer anymore?

They only ever want to watch cricket!

What do bumblebees say after scoring a goal?

Hive Scored!

Are you a huge football or soccer fan looking for a great soccer joke to tell your football team or soccer lover friends? Well, we have the world cup of soccer jokes right here, that would make any soccer or football fan or football player feel like they scored a hat trick on their birthday! All of the soccer puns are like a great funny dad joke that would make the whole football pitch laugh, even the soccer referee! Each funny joke is guaranteed to make any kid or football fan laugh, and make the soccer stadium go crazy like the world cup. Share these funny soccer quotes and soccer puns with any man woman or person who is a huge soccer fan like you, and make them laugh at the sport that they love so much better than at any funny video on twitter or the internet. Even your soccer coach or soccer referee will love these funniest soccer or football game jokes, and your goal keeper will fall on the ground laughing at these funny soccer quotes that will make every football game super fun. All of the footballers or soccer players, even the soccer coach in your football club will not be able to stop laughing at these funniest jokes, so share them with all of your friends!

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