Infinitely Funny Math Jokes

Looking for a way to brighten up your boring old math class? You'll be the number one funniest person with these great math jokes!

I went into math class today and said to my teacher,

"To show you how well I understand fractions, I've only done half of my homework.

Why should you worry about the math teacher holding graph paper?

She’s definitely plotting something.

Why should you never talk to Pi?

Because she’ll go on and on and on forever.

How do you stay warm in any room?

Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.

Why was the equal sign so humble?

Because she knew she wasn’t greater than or less than anyone else.

What do you call the number 7 and the number 3 when they go out on a date?

The odd couple (but 7 is in her prime).

Why are parallel lines so tragic if they have so much in common?

It’s a shame they’ll never meet.

What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?

A middle school math problem!

How do you know when you’ve reached your Math Professors voice-mail?

The message is “The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please, rotate your phone by 90 degrees and try again…”

After a talking sheepdog gets all the sheep in the pen, he reports back to the farmer: “All 40 accounted for.” “But I only have 36 sheep,” says the farmer.

“I know,” says the sheepdog. “But I rounded them up.”

The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic.

But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier.

What did one math book say to the other?

Stop bothering me… I’ve got my own problems!

Why did the student sit on the floor to do her multiplication problems?

The teacher told her not to use tables!

What do you call a number that can’t keep still?

A roamin’ numeral!

Why do they never serve beer at a math party?

Because you can’t drink and derive…

Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?

Because it had more cents.

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with a pencil.

What does the little mermaid wear?

An algae-bra.

"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!"

"Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."

Who invented algebra?

A Clever X-pert.

What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza?

A large pizza can feed a family of four

How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children?

`I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times...'

What is the world's longest song?

"Aleph-nought Bottles of Beer on the Wall."

Looking for a great math joke to tell that math teacher or physicist during math class? Look no further for great math humor, we have the best math puns, funny math jokes, and calculus jokes on the block! Any kid in your class doing math homework will burst out laughing at each good math joke, and even a humorless mathematician or math professor will see the humor in all of these mathematical puns, no matter how much of a square root, differential operator, or obtuse triangle they are! These funny math jokes and memes are sure to crack up any math major or statistician person in your life, all math folks and math professionals will see proof of humor in these great mathematical puns, and take a break from graphing rational functions to have a laugh at your calculus jokes and math puns. The basic facts of mathematical humor are proof in the geometry of these mathematical ideas, and you can crack up any logician at your elementary school on pi day, and make them spit out their ham sandwich at these funny jokes about negative numbers and graph paper. Get rid of the math book, and make your humorless mathematician friend laugh and smile at each and every good math joke, and turn that obtuse triangle of a frown into the parallel lines of a laughing smile during your math homework.